It’s been an entire year with you and I feel like I’ve known you forever. It’s hard to even remember what life was like before you were born. Being your mother is a feeling that is indescribable. You bring so much joy to our lives with your scrunchy nose smile and your personality that’s bigger than you’ll ever be. It’s only been one year and my world is changed forever.
The day you were born brought a whirlwind of emotions along with it. Excitement that you were going to be entering the world; nervousness that I literally had no idea what I was doing; relief when I gave that final push; and fear when they told me they needed to bring you to NICU. Talk about a roller coaster of a day. However, that next morning when I finally got to hold you in my arms, all those emotions went away and I was overflowing with joy (and tears).
We spent the next 5 days in the hospital and you proved your strength to those doctors up until the very minute you were released and we were finally able to bring you home. You’re a fighter and that’s a good thing. You needed that strength as we spent the first 3 months of your life living in 3 different places, including some stranger’s pool house. With being moved from place to place, you found a sense of home in my arms—you crawl to me yelling “MAMA” and still like to be rocked to sleep at night.
This first year has been nothing shy of eventful. Thinking about how much you have grown since that first day I got to hold you bring back that flood of emotions. I am excited you are a whole year old; I’m still nervous I have no idea what I’m doing; I am grateful you are such a healthy and happy baby; and I am afraid of this world you are growing up in. It is scary knowing that I am the one God chose to raise you into a woman. This past year showed how inadequate I am for this position but it’s you and me girl and I like a challenge.
I would not change a single moment of this past year; I only wish it wouldn’t have gone by so fast. I want to remember each and every second with you. I want to remember you’re four tiny teeth, your head full of hair (that look adorable in pigtails, might I add), your bubbly personality, your preference of mornings over nights, your love of food, your fascination with taking all of the books off the bookshelf, your kind heart that is so open to everyone, your attachment to your bunny blanket, your enjoyment of banging things together and yelling at the top of your lungs, that you say “dada” when you’re happy and “mama” when you’re sad, your sick dance moves that you obviously got from your dad and most of all THOSE CHUNKY LEGS. So. Many. Rolls.
There are so many things I want to teach you but in all reality you are teaching me so much. You’ve taught me to be patient, to trust, and most important of all: how to love unconditionally. 12 months. You’ve only been here for 12 months and God has already used in big ways to shape our lives forever.
I love you to the moon and back, Baby Moon. Happy 1st Birthday.
Photos- Danielle Nicole Photography
Outfit- Miss Molly June Designs
Cake- Elise’s Pieces